Nothing Is Ever Simple
by FallAngel
Summary: Noah has been sent by Luncinda to break up Luke and a boyfriend she thinks is "unsuitble" for her granson
1. Chapter 1

**Title:** Nothing Is Ever Simple  
**Author:** FallenAngel  
**Chapter** 1/?  
**Rating: **PG-13  
**Summery:** Noah has been sent by Lucinda to break up Luke and a boyfriend she thinks is "unsutible" for her grandson..  
**Pairing: **Luke/Noah  
**Word count:** ~ 3455  
**Disclaimer:** I don't own anything here except my own words and a handful of original characters. No copyright infringement is intended.  
**Author's notes:** I love feedback

_Introduction _

Being Noah Mayer wasn't easy. It wasn't even an option when you were Col. Winston Mayer's son. But lying to yourself...trying so hard to be someone you weren't... was something Noah could no longer do.

Fed up with having wasted so many years not being himself, Noah decided to tell his parents he was gay. He was well aware of the consequences of coming out. That kind of lifestyle was totally unacceptable to Col. Mayer. The words "gay" or "homosexual" didn't even exist in his dictionary.

Accordingly, when Noah told dear old dad he was gay, his father's reply was simple and direct.

"Boy you better start running now for the hills!"

That's exactly what the young Mayer did eight years ago at age 18. He hasn't stopped running since.

He may have left home with few possessions. But he took with him some of his psycho dad's best lessons. At his father's knee, he had learned how to cover his tracks; how to change his identity; and basically how to disappear from the face of the earth. He also learned what jobs wouldn't require records leaving a necessary paper trail. That meant being a film director was out the question. There were just some things you had to sacrifice whether you liked it or not.

"Suck it up son," his dad used to say.

The next few years were tough for Noah. But he made out OK becoming very good at picking up jobs here and there. Little did he know that a certain female force of nature known as Lucinda Walsh would come knocking on his door in the middle of the night and change his life forever. It's here that our story begins on a warm summer night in June.

First Chapter ~ Easier Said Than Done

Noah Mayer was very fond of the saying "you can't see the forest for the trees." That's why he had settled on such a hidden location for his home. Even if you were to look through those densely dark trees that surrounded his small cabin, Noah's home was so well hidden that even if you were looking directly at it, you'd never spot it.

A sudden soft knock on the door startled Noah. He got up from the sofa; walked across the small room; and slowly opened the door. On the other side stood an older woman dressed like a page out of Vogue Magazine.

"Good... Evening," Noah said slowly, gripping the door knob tightly. He took a moment to examine the woman more closely. She looked very small standing there in front of him. By pure instinct he knew, if it was necessary, he could take this woman out. Not to mention the fact that she wasn't just an old woman. But an old woman with determination evident in her eyes. As they stood there, he couldn't help but to look just past her shoulder. Just a precaution mind you to make sure there weren't any more surprises about to pop up. Surprises like dear old dad.

"Good Evening" She replied with a smile etched on her lips and a somewhat of a victorious glint in her eyes.

The silence seemed to hang like a thick layer in the air. Noah shifted uncomfortably.

"Hum… Can I help you with something?" Noah offered.

He figured the faster he could get this woman out of his house, the better. If someone had managed to find him, it meant trouble and he needed fix it quickly.

She nodded. "Yes I think you can John or would you prefer. . . Noah?" She asked as she walked past him.

"Come on in," Noah sighed before closing the door slowly. The invitation gave him time to compose himself before turning to face this strange woman, who called him by the name he hadn't used in four years.

"Ho- How do you know my name?"

She walked around the one room before sitting down by a dusty table.

"Oh, I know a lot about you, Noah Mayer, beginning with the fact that you've been hiding for four years from a Winston Mayer. Any relation?" She looked around with a sad smile.

Noah could have sworn he could see pity in her face.

"Do you know how hard it was to find you? It took 10 private detectives working night and day to track you down," She stated, still looking around the room rather than directly at him.

Noah crossed his arms, trying to hold back an irritation growing within him. "I'm touched," he said. "How the hell did they find me? "And why exactly are you here? It must be pretty important since it took a whole squad of detectives to find me."

She leaned forward and another sad look crossed her face for a moment before, what Noah would call, a business face emerged. He had seen it so many times. "I'm here to help you?"

"Help me?" Noah couldn't help but laugh. "You're here to help me? I'm sorry lady. But it's usually the person who hires 10 private detectives to find some guy living in the middle of nowhere, who needs the help." With a grin, he pressed back into his chair and pointed a thumb at his chest. "Not me."

She held up a hand to stop his chatter. "All right, Noah. Yes, I do need your help with something." She reached down into her over-sized Dolce and Gabbana handbag.

"With what exactly?" Noah said, his eyes glued to the bag.

She pulled out a folder and handed it to him. "With this!"

Noah quickly scanned the contents of the folder. It was a dossier actually all about someone named Reg Arrington, who apparently owned an oil company.

"So what's the deal with this guy? If you want me to kill him, you're asking the wrong guy."

She snorted. "Don't be silly… I need you to check him out for me. See if he has had any shady business deals going on perhaps is involved in any kind of of illegal activities. "

"Lady, I'm telling you you've got the wrong guy. I don't play pet detective," Noah said, dropping the folder on the table. "Besides that's not the whole story, is it? You didn't track me down to dig up dirt on some guy because we both know that's not the way I work."

The woman hesitated for a minute. "I can't believe that I'm doing this. But I'm out of options," she muttered more to herself than to Noah. "This Reg person is dating my grandson. Actually it's more than just dating. They engaged to be married soon."

"Aw… How sweet," he interrupted. "Well I don't play best men either."

She shot him an glare before continuing. "When that happens, Reg will become an even richer man than he was before thanks for the inheritance my grandson will receive on his wedding day."

_Why is everything always about money? _

"How much money are we talking about?" Noah couldn't help to ask. He knew that people such as this woman wouldn't command such a force to track him down unless it was something major and worth mega bucks.

"Let's just say more than a couple of million," She said simply as if it were chump change.

_Holy Mother of God…_ "I still don't get what this has to do with me."

"My gut tells me that this Reg is only doing this relationship for the money. I can't let him get a hold of it. Not at the cost of my grandson's heart." She lean forward, grabbing both of Noah's hands; and starred at him for a moment. "I can promise you that if you succeed, you, Noah Mayer, will be a very wealthy man."

"How wealthy?" He couldn't believe he was asking that! He shouldn't be asking it. This had already gone too far.

"Very wealthy," she said softly. "Besides the money, I can assured you that you and your mother will be well hidden in the Federal Witness Protection Program. So well hidden that Winston Mayer will never find either one of you."

"And what is it that you want in return?"

"I want you to break up Reg and my grandson."

"How?"

"By any means necessary. Get close to my grandson. Make him open his eyes. I don't know. Just do something to ensure a permanent break up."

_Not that… _

Noah stood up so fast, his chair tipped over.

"Thank you for dropping by whoever you are." He grabbed her arm and started pulling her toward the door. "It was nice to meet you and thanks for the offer. But I'm not interested," he said opening the door and starting to push her out. "Drive carefully...and don't ever contact me again."

"Wait!" She pulled out a business card. "If you should change your mind, please call me." It wasn't hard for Noah to hear the desperation in her voice.

He shook his head. "I don't think so. Good-bye." With that, he shut the door behind her.

Noah leaned against the closed door for a moment. It was always about that. Why couldn't it be something else and not about breaking up a happy couldn't it be him pretending to be someone else's husband? Anything but that.

Noah looked down at the business card she had shoved in his hand.

_Lucinda Walsh, CEO, World Wide Industries _

"How about that? Another rich person," he mumbled before tossing the card into the trash.

"I'm not doing that again, not after last time." He recalled how much it hurts to lie to people and for what? Money?

His heart couldn't take it, especially when the chances of falling in love were involved. Noah had learned the hard way what happens if you fall in love with a job. It never ended well… at least not for him.

_"But think of the money!" _he thought. _"Think about the witness protection program that would keep Mom safe and far away from him!" _His mom lived in fear every day of being abused by the colonel. He could save her with this money. He could give his mom her life back...the life she deserved to live.

_"You can't live like this." _he debated. _"It's killing you even if you won't admit it! You can't stay here forever because of your father! Fight back!" _

"Stop it!" he screamed out. As usual, there was no reply only the beating of his heart and the start of a headache.

The sound of a phone ringing interrupted his thoughts. He slowly walked over to the phone and picked up the receiver.

"John," he said.

"Hi honey," a voice whispered on the other end.

Noah almost dropped the phone. "Mom." _"Mom…" _Noah felt like crying and laughing at the same time. It's so good to hear her voice again.

"How are you?" he whispered. _"Please be all right… Please!" _

"I'm fine, baby."

"You're lying."

Having to keep their contacts to minimum, Noah had learned to treasure those moments. He knew how to listen to the meaning behind his mother's words, the part that still felt the need to protect him.

"I'm not a child anymore Mom."

"I know sweetie…. I know," she said in a sad voice.

"Did he hurt you?" Noah asked, clutching the receiver so hard to almost breaking it. He hated to ask the question even if he knew the answer. But Noah always hoped that just for one day Winston would leave his mother alone.

"I'll be fine," she tried to reassure her son. "How are you, Sweetie?"

"I'm fine," His thoughts slid back to the conversation with Ms. Walsh. "I was offered a job."

"That's good." He could hear the happiness in her voice.

"No Mom, it's not," Noah said quietly, knowing that he had just crushed his mom's hope of a normal life for her son.

"Is it another Matt situation?"

"Yeah," he whispered, holding the phone closer to his ear; deeply hoping for some kind of comfort by his mother. They both knew what a Matt situation meant. " The offer is still on the table. But I can't say yes even if I want to. I don't think my heart could bear it."

"Then don't accept it, No--... John." She almost slipped. "If you can't do it, then don't. There will be other jobs."

"Not one that pays this good.

"How good?"

"Very good. So good it would solve all our problems," he said. He heard how her breath is hitched when the words sank in. "They are offering witness protection along with a whole lot of money. "

"Sweetie, it's not worth it."

"But this could be what we have been waiting for so long!"

"Not at the cost of your heart," She hissed on the other end. "Not if it's going to break it again. I won't stand for you tormenting yourself for my freedom… I just can't, Sweetie."

"Charlene!" Noah heard his father's loud bellowing voice in the background. "Get down here!"

"He's looking for you, Noah. Please be safe, Sweetie. Please know that whatever you decide to do, I love you." She whispered and hung up.

Noah stared at the phone. He hadn't heard his father's voice for almost five years. And yet, it still sounded as angry and as violent as it had the day he told him he was gay.

_"I have to do this for her…" _

He walked back to the trash and picked up the card, a ticket to a whole new world for Mom and for him. Noah had done jobs like this before. He knew that he was good at it, too. He knew how charm people; how make them trust him; and then how break them. It was easier when it was just business without getting close to someone; getting to know them. He much rather preferred dealing with the John Does than with the persons whose names he learned.

_"I can do this… I know I can…" _

Noah turned over the card. As he expected, the name and address of a hotel in the nearby town were written on the back. He grabbed his coat and with a determination he had never felt before, Noah started walking out from deep within the forest and toward town.

It didn't take him long before he found her hotel and her room.

He took a deep breath before knocking on the door. When it opened, he couldn't help to smile just a little bit. This time he was prepared for an late night chat.

"Good Evening, Ms. Walsh."

"Noah! Can I help you with something?"

"Yes, I think you can, Ms. Walsh, or would you prefer Lucinda?" he asked with a small grin.

"I guess that means you've reconsidered my offer?"

"Yes I have." He nodded. "I have only one condition though. You make sure my mother is safe before I take even one step into this whole mess."

She looked at him for a moment. Her face softened.. "That sounds reasonable. Come inside and let me just make a phone call."

Lucinda picked up her cell phone. She soon started talking in a very demanding tone to someone. Noah figured it was one of her subordinates.

"So…" He looked around. _"God, she's so rich. Look at this room."_

Lucinda concluded her phone call.

"Your grandson...what's his name?" Noah asked.

"Luke," she said with a smile.

"Luke...and where do you people live?" Noah asked as he sat down on the plush sofa.

"Oakdale, Illinois." She sat down beside him.

"So how do we do this? I mean who do you want me to be?"

Her answer surprised Noah. "No one but yourself. We might need you to shave a bit and buy some new clothes. But other than that, I want you to be you."

She stood up to pull a small envelope out of her handbag. "That's one of the reasons why I picked you, Noah. I know you and my grandson have a lot of things in common...more so than you might think."

"Here." Lucinda handed the envelope to her new employee. "You leave for Chicago first thing tomorrow."

"Tomorrow?" _this woman doesn't waste time." _"And don't worry. I'll take my jet and meet you there," Lucinda added when she saw a bit of panic sweeping across Noah's face. "We'll go through the details then and with that I'll say goodnight. It's been a long day for an old lady like me."

Then she did something else that surprised him. She picked up her bag and coat and walked toward the door. He walked a few steps behind with her. She then offered him a kiss on the cheek and a wish.

"Good Night, Noah. Sweet dreams," She said softly.

"Wait...You're leaving....and I'm staying..." He asked a bit confused. "here?"

"Yes you are. I trust that won't be problem."

"Sleeping in a $200-a-night room? No....No problem at all."

"Good night then," Lucinda repeated and with that she closed the door softly behind her.

"What have I gotten myself into?" He asked himself before drifting off to sleep.

*** I love feedback ***


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2 - A step closer

Since the day he left home nearly five years ago, Noah had not flown, boarded a train or ridden on a bus for a simple yet complicated reason. Taking public transit would mean purchasing a ticket. Tickets were kept as records. And, record information was stored in data bases easily accessible to a well-trained military strategist bent on finding his "wayward" gay son. So in order to stay under the radar net spread by the colonel, Noah walked, biked or drove using a false license whenever necessary.

Yet here was Noah standing in line at the Frontier Airlines ticket counter at Montana's Billings Logan International Airport; waiting to check in as John Husman, an alias he had used several times. He tried to blend in with other travelers all the while watching the movements of the ticket agents and the Transportation Security Agency agents behind the counter and staffing the nearby bank of metal detectors.

His heart rate grew quick with every step that brought him closer to the counter. Lucinda had assured him that the traveling documents inside his jacket were legitimate; and would ensure his safe passage through the check-in process. But he kept up his guard because he knew that even the slightest misstep could in a minute destroy the protective shield he had created.

"Excuse me, sir?"

Noah's head snapped around. _Sheesh what now?_

"May I see your photo ID and necessary travel documents," The ticket agent held out his hand.

Noah let out a nervous chuckle. "Oh yeah" He reached into the breast pocket of his jacket. "Here's my license and a bill folder containing the necessary documents."

"Thank you, Mr....Husman. " The agent began to scan the information. His pleasant expression quickly turned serious as he looked up; and signaled a nearby TSA agent. "Just wait here, sir. I'll be right back." The ticket agent took Noah's documents and false license with him. Noah watched as the man and the TSA representative disappeared together behind a rear door.

Noah became anxious.

_O God... I messed up…_Noah thought, when the two men reappeared in the distance talking with two other TSA agents. It appeared to be very serious. He couldn't hear what they were saying. Whatever the subject was, it couldn't be good. Noah's anxious feeling was now reaching near panic stage.

For a moment he considered turning on his heel and quickly leaving the line and the airport. He'd get a bus or hop on a train, anything else that hopefully didn't demand travel documents. But he knew a quick departure would only serve to add to any suspicion the agents already had. He decided to take his chances and stay at the counter. After all, he had promised Lucinda he would be in Chicago by tomorrow.

Noah took a deep breath as he saw the ticket agent returning to the counter.

"Here you go, Mr. Husman. Sorry about the wait. Everything appears to be in order. "

Noah exhaled, feeling the tension slipping away. "Thank you" He said with a weak smile.

"Have a pleasant flight to Chicago, Sir."

"Thanks, again" Noah said, this time his smile grew a little bit bigger. The agent nodded before turning to the next traveler in line.

With a slight grin on his lips, Noah walked through the metal detectors. For a moment he had a hard time controlling himself. He felt like jumping up and down with sure joy. Something he hadn't done in a very long time. Noah had actually succeeded consequence free.

"_I made it… I actually made it!"_

For the first time in five years Noah could be Noah Mayer without feeling any shame or fear for who he was. He had outwitted his father at the colonel's own game. He celebrated knowing that no matter how much power his father exerted, Noah had started leveling the playing field with people like Lucinda Walsh and officials of the federal Witness Protection Program. They were strong enough and powerful enough to help his mom and Noah escape the colonel's tyranny.

"_Don't celebrate until the job is done,"_ Noah's conscience warned him. _"You know what happened if you start to get sloppy."_ Noah sighed. But his outward smile was so to fade.

****

Inside the departure lounge, Noah sat down at a cafe when something started to vibrate inside his pants' pocket.

"What the hell?" He murmured as he reached into the pocket. "Oh"… It was the cell phone Lucinda had given Noah after she found out he didn't have one.

_"But come on, who needs a phone when you live in the middle of nowhere, trying to hide? A cell phone doesn't exactly scream 'You need me' if you don't have anyone to call or can't contact anyone for that matter." _

"John" He replied automatically.

"We talked about this, Noah" Lucinda Walsh's voice sparked on the other end. "No more, John Huston."

"Got it," Noah grinned a bit. "So, why are you calling me? I thought you said you were going to call as soon as you landed in Chicago"

"I just wanted to make sure you got through security," she said. Noah could hear the sincerity in her voice.

Noah's heart melted a bit when he heard the words. No one had cared about him for a long time.

"Yes, everything went fine. I was a bit worried when I got to the check in but…"

Lucinda interrupted him.

"Silly boy, I told you there was nothing to be worried about… I'm not Lucinda Walsh, president and CEO of World Wide Industries for nothing." Noah could have sworn she tossed that golden mane of hers so authoritatively.

"I know. I know. But when it comes to me and my life, something always seems to go wrong... no matter what I do!"

"Don't worry sweetie, I'm a professional."

Noah grinned. "I'm not worried anymore… not the slightest."

"That's good. So if there's nothing more, I'll say good-bye."

"Well… actually there is," Noah started dragging the zipper on his jacket up and down. "I was just wondering…"

"Yes?"

"If I wanted to… call someone, would that be OK?" Noah asked in a small voice, considering the cell phone wasn't _his._

"It's your cell phone Noah. I gave it to you remember?" she said as if it was plainly obvious.

"...and no I don't want to hear another word about..." she added before Noah had a chance to protest. "If you want to call your mother, then go ahead and call her!"

"How did you know?"

"I'm a mother too, Noah." She stated. "And yes before you ask, it's safe to call her. He won't be able to track that phone" and then she was gone without saying goodbye. But what she had said hadn't escape Noah.

Noah stared at the phone for a moment; unsure what to do. But if he were going to do this job, he needed his mother's advice. Slowly and still unsure, he punched in the numbers he knew by heart and hit send.

"Mayer Residence."

_"She sounds worse than she did 24 hours ago...What the hell did he do to her?"_

"Hi Mom," he said, trying to sound normal and not letting his emotions get in the way. Noah didn't dare to ask if she was OK, even if it was obvious that she wasn't. After all, he didn't feel the need to clarify something that they both knew was an unspoken rule between them. It was a sad fact that had grown to be a part of their life, a part that Noah was determine to eliminate.

"You know Noah, I got a very interesting phone call yesterday," his s mom said with a smile heard in her voice. Someone from the Witness Protection Program had contacted her and she seemed a bit happier. "You wouldn't happen to know anything about it, would you?"

"Maybe."

"You took the job, didn't you?" He heard her sigh. "You did it for me. That was what you meant when you said that an offer like this wouldn't come around again." She said more to herself then to Noah. "Noah, sweetie"

"Yes, Mom, I did it for you. I would do anything to get you out of there and the hell away from him."

"You're willing to sacrifice your heart? Haven't I taught you anything?" she said in an angry voice although not raised and without a trace of disappointment.

"You did teach me something, Mom. You taught me to follow my heart wherever it leads me; and that's what I'm doing. Right now my heart is screaming to save you; to give you the life you deserve." He clenched his jaw. "Not as _his_ punching bag."

"Do you remember what happened with Matt?" asked his mom.

"Of course, how could I forget?" he said through clenched teeth.

_Matt had been the first job Noah had gotten or it might have been the second or third… He couldn't remember those details because the order wasn't important. But he never forgot a job, however it was his first job that involved breaking up a couple. _

_People used to tell Noah that you never forget your first job, first time, or your first lover or crush. You don't forget the first time you learned how to ride a bike or the first time you went fishing with your dad. Memories of those father and son moments may fade overtime. It's harder to forget your first break up or your first loss or your first big screw up._

Noah hadn't had a lot of good first time situations. But Matt had been Noah's first in so many ways… crush, lover, break up and first big screw up…more first then he could count.

_When you had Noah's job, the ground rule was to get in and then get out as quickly as possible, no matter the job becuase if you stayed behind, things would get ugly, sooner or later._

You weren't supposed to fall in love with your job; stick around for the actually break up; or stay and attempt to pick up the pieces of the lifes you shattered, those were the main rules, get in and get out..

But sometimes the rules were the biggest problems with an assignment. You can't control when to fall in love or when to leave or stick around and somehow think that this it going to work…Your wrong...it doesn't, it ends in disaster, because sooner or later they're going to figure it out or one of the member in the family is going to tell them…

"Happy endings" didn't exist with the job, becuase sooner or later the truth would come out, and that's when you got your heart broken. That's when everything ends, because no one wants to stay when they find out, especially when they find out that you lied about who you were, name, age, family, everything you ever told them. Trying to convince them that the love you felt was real, the feelings were true and in the end the money didn't matter, didn't really work…

_Noah never took the money, he only took Matt's memory with him, a treasure to chairs and yet a painful lesson that had been learned. After Noah hadn't fallen in love… he had learned his lesson… "_

"Noah, are you there?" Charlene said, interrupting his thoughts.

"Yes, I remember Matt. But I'm telling you Mom, that happened a long time ago and this job is different. I'm fine, I swear."

Charlene knew this was a battle she wasn't going to win against her son. Noah's stubbornness was the only good thing that he had inherited from his father. "OK. I'm following your lead on this one. But please, please," she pleaded, "take care of yourself."

"I always do Mom."

"Charlene!" Winston screaming voice was heard in the background. The line went dead. Noah glared at the cell phone. _You f'ucking bastard. One day you will pay."_

An announcement over the loud-speaker system interrupted Noah's threat. "Attention Frontier Airlines Flight 785 to Chicago will begin boarding in 10 minutes at Gate 12B."

_"Chicago, here I come…_"


	3. Chapter 3

Title: Nothing Is Ever Simple  
Author: Fallangel  
Chapter 2/?  
Rating: PG-13  
Summery: Noah has been sent by Lucinda to break up Luke and a boyfriend she thinks is "unsutible" for her grandson..  
Word count: ~ 2,200  
Disclaimer: I don't own anything here except my own words and a handful of original characters. No copyright infringement is intended.  
Author's notes: Okay.. So I was kind of hoping that I could lurve those of you who seemed to have left since the last chapter, with the fact that Luke is in this chapter! I know, a bit cheap.. and I just wanted to say that I'm so sorry about the late update.. I'll try to speed it up..

_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

"But Lucinda, this really isn't necessary!" Noah protested. But it was too late. The scissor had already taken its first cut.

"Too late sweetie" She said with a smile as she patted him on the shoulder. "I know you're against this whole makeover. But you need it. We can't have you walking around looking like some homeless person."

"But I am a homeless person!"

"Not for long you're not."

Noah sighed. One thing he had learned about Lucinda Walsh in the 48 hours he had known her was that you did what she told you to do. No matter if it was getting a haircut or jumping off a cliff. He also learned that she knew what she was doing, and that in the end, she was always right.

Noah couldn't tear himself away from the mirror as the hair stylist continued to cut, With every snip, he could see a little bit more of his old self staring back at him. That lost and sad 18-year-old boy, who had ran away, was gazing back at him except he didn't look so lost or sad anymore. Instead, those blue eyes were filled with a spark of life.

"Look at you," Lucinda said with a wide smile as she looked in the mirror; still holding a hand on Noah's shoulder. Suddenly "In the Mood" by Glenn Miller started playing. Noah glanced around with a surprised look on his face.

"That's me," Lucinda said with a smile. She pulled out her cell phone from her pocket. "Make sure he gets a shave, too," she told the stylist before walking away to answer the call.

"Of course, Madam."

Noah did managed to hear Lucinda say "Hello Luke" before she walked away. He tried desperately to evasdrop on the conversation. But Lucinda was too far away for him to hear what she was saying. "Damn" He cursed silently.

When it came to Luke, Lucinda had refused to give Noah any information at all regarding her grandson. This was driving him slowly insane. When he usually got a client, who he was supposed to charm his way into their hearts, he got a little bit of background. At least something to work with. But not this time. No middle name or family members or pets or even a photographs.

"There you go. Mr. Mayer," the hairdresser said as she took off and shook Noah's fallen locks from the salon cape.

"Thank you.," He stood up, running his fingers through his newly cropped hair. It felt good somehow. Noah couldn't believe how much he had changed back to resembling Noah Mayer since Lucinda first knocked on his door.

"Are you ready to go?" Lucinda asked, interrupting Noah's thoughts and his inner search.

"Yeah, I am." He smiled and grabbed his coat. "How's Luke?" He asked as he held up the door for Lucinda.

"He's fine" she replied.

"Tell me again why you won't tell me anything about him?" Noah asked as they started walking to the next place on Lucinda's Makeover Noah List.

"Because I want you get to know him like normal people do."

Noah snorted. "Yeah, and as for immoral, you mean people like me who has been hired to make sure Luke and his fiancé break up," he said with a hint of sarcasm. "What I don't get is why you refuse me to let me do my job the way I usually operate."

Lucinda stopped and glared at him. "I need you to be you; and act like a normal person, in case something would go wrong"

"Wrong?" Noah raised an eyebrow. "And by wrong, you mean if your family finds out that you hired someone to end your grandson's relationship. Because you don't think he's the right man for you grandson.. And if, God forbid, your family finds out, they're going to call the police, which is going to end with me in jail..." Noah crossed his arms. "Am I getting close?" He asked.

"Yes," Lucinda muttered. "But the main reason why I want to do this as right and legal as possible is to protect you, too" Lucinda said softly. "I don't want your life to be ruined because of me."

"Sorry to break it to you, Lucinda. But my life is already ruined" Noah said, unfolding his arms and starting to walk again. "And we're well past the legal stage."

"Well, let's at least try to keep it as legal as we can," she replied.

For the first time since they had left the salon, Noah looked around. "Where exactly are we and where are we going?" He asked when they suddenly stopped outside a store.

"We are going to buy you some new clothes." Lucinda said as she opened the door. "Ralph! " She yelled as she stepped inside.

"What's wrong with my clothes?" Noah asked confused as he followed her. "Whoa lady. I am not buying $500 suits so that I can impress some guy. No way. Ain't going to happen!" Noah held up his hands in protest as he looked around the store. A store for rich people or at least people with money judging by the Gucci, Prada and other designer labels. Even if Noah wasn't the biggest fashion consumer, he knew what was expensive and what was not.

"There is nothing wrong with my clothes." He snapped back at her. "Besides, I don't think I should try to be a rich dude with a lot of money. I don't think it's the kind of man Luke would fall for," Noah added.

Lucinda turned around and glared at him.

"Oh, really?" she asked, walking toward him all the while not breaking eye contact. "What makes you say that?"

"Well…" Noah started off nervously. "Everything you told me about Reg; how he dresses in expensive suits; takes Luke to fancy restaurants; spoils him with the latest gadgets makes me think that I need to show Luke a different kind of man."

Noah continued. "I know you told me that when Luke was younger, he used to hate being treated like he was a rich spoiled kid."

Lucinda nodded. "Yes, that's true. He used to hate that people saw him as a spoiled kid and not as an ordinary person"

"I need to show him a person who's the opposite of Reg," he said suddenly starting to look at the different displays. "I need to show him..." Noah mumbled more to himself then to Lucinda, while he started to pull shirts off the rack and place them on the counter. "I need to show him...me." He walked back to Lucinda, examining the shirts he had picked out.

Noah had selected three plaid shirts - one red and white, a maroon and pale green; and the popular green and black.

"Plaids?" Lucinda asked with a confused look.

"Yes, plaids! I need to show him what kind of man I am or used to be," Noah said as he started pulling out more shirts. "I'm the exact opposite of Reg, "Noah said with a smile. "So I just need to be me in order to charm him, something I haven't been in a while…

_"O goodness, how on earth is that going to work..?. I have to be me… I'll complete fail, it going to end in disaster, he's going hate me"_ He thought as the realization hit him.

"Are you sure about this?"

Noah turned around and looked at Lucinda eye to eye. "Yes, I am."

"OK" Lucinda said in hesitant voice as she lifted her credit card from her wallet and handed it to Ralph. "I'll take your lead on this one."

"Smart and handsome." Ralph said with a smile toward Noah as he took Lucinda's credit card.

"Hush you!" she groaned.

Noah felt a nervous feeling rise again. But it wasn't the nervous panic he felt back in Billings at the check-in counter. No, this was that kind of nervous feeling that leaves you stuttering when you stand before a person you've been dying to meet and suddenly the cat got your tongue. A little like that was how Noah Mayer felt as he drove passed a sign stating _Oakdale, 1 Mile _

_For crying out loud! I've done this so many times before. Why should this be any different? Why do I feel this way?_

It didn't help that Lucinda had dumped him right before they had to leave for Oakdale. She had gotten a phone call from someone requesting a business meeting. Before heading off to wherever she was going, which she didn't tell him, Lucinda had given Noah a kiss along with directions to a car and then to the Snyder Farm.

_Why would he want to marry a guy who's the opposite of who he wants to be? There's got to be something wrong with this guy. _

Noah saw the sign for Snyder Farm ~ Thoroughbred Horses; and pulled into the driveway. Before him sat what appeared to be a very hold farmhouse and a path leading to a huge barn. Noah stepped out of the car, taking in his surroundings before walking up to the house. He opened the door to the porch and knocked lightly on the kitchen door.

_I bet he's ugly, mean and just simply annoying…. like those bullies in high school who picked on me.. _

A blond young man with chocolate brown eyes that captivated Noah, opened the door.

"Hi" The man said softly.

Noah starred at him for a moment before putting out his hand. "I'm Noah Mayer; I'm here about the job for a farm hand?"

"Luke Snyder," He smiled, shaking Noah's hand. "Come on in." Luke said as he held the door open for Noah.

_Or he could simply be beautiful and kind…_

"Dad!" Luke yelled, which made Noah smile. It's seems to be running the family to yell out loud as soon as they enter the room.

Noah heard a creak that sounded like someone was coming down from upstairs. A minute later, an older man with a friendly face appeared.

"You must be Noah Mayer," he said, reaching out his hand. "Holden Snyder."

"Yes, that's me, sir," Noah answered nervously. "It's a pleasure to meet you."

"We weren't expecting you until Sunday" Holden said softly. "But it's actually great that you are here earlier than we expected," Holden added as he noticed Noah's worried expression. "We have a big load of hay coming in tomorrow and I could need an extra pair of hands."

Noah nodded with relief. At first, he had thought Holden would have been angry that he had arrived earlier. But it didn't take that long for Noah to figure out that this man was nothing like his own father, not even close.

"Excuse me for asking sir. But I was wondering if you would tell me the location of the nearest motel or boarding house? I need a place to stay. If you know of some place that's nearby and cheap, I'd really appreciate it" Noah asked shyly.

"Didn't anyone tell you?" Holden replied with a concerned look.

"Told me what?" Noah asked now confused.

"That the job includes room and board," Holden said firmly."I need the extra help and we can't have you driving here three in the morning so that you can get to work in time. Besides it's cheaper for you to be staying here. We wouldn't mind the company and we have the room."

"But…" Noah was becoming even more confused. "When I called a couple of days ago to confirm with you, the guy who answered said that you didn't have the room…"

"Wait. What? Who said that?"

"I did," answered a dark voice behind Noah. A tall man with black hair stood behind him with his arms around Luke's waist.

"Reg," Holden said sarcastically. "I thought I made it clear that you would stay the hell out of my business, when it comes to the farm"

"I don't want some strange dude under the same roof as my fiance." Reg defended himself.

Holden sighed and for a moment it looked like he was going to punch Reg. "You and your jealousy. Why do you always think that every guy that walks through that door is gay?" he muttered. "You better keep it under control this time or I will have no problem throwing you out of this house, Reg!"

"You can't throw me out" Reg said with an evil grin. "Because you know if I leave, Luke will go with me."

Holden clenched his teeth. "I would appreciate if you let my own son speak for himself;, and concerning Noah," Holden said, pointing to the new farm worker. "He is staying no matter how hard you try to get rid of him. I'm done with you and your accusations. You've already gotten rid of five qualified people; and I'm not going to let you do it again." Holden said, near the boiling point.

"Noah, my advice to you is to keep away from this man," Holden said, pointing at Reg. "Now, come on. I'll show you around."

"No problem Mr. Snyder" Noah replied and followed Holden but not before casting a last glance at Luke and his fiance. Reg returned his glance with one full of jealousy and hate. "God, that guy has a lot of issues, doesn't he?" Noah mumbled to himself.

_So Both a jerk and jealousy, now this is going to be fun.. _

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You already know by now how much I love feedback Even if it's just 3 words, it still warms my heart


	4. Chapter 4

**Author's notes:** Okay.. Again, I'm so sorry for the late update, but since I just removed my stiches yesterday, I hope I can be forgiven.. Also a big thanks to my brother who helped me writ this chapter, when my hand gave up in pain.. Thank you big brother

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Luke walked frustrated back and forth through the small bedroom while casting angry glares at Reg who was sitting by the bed with his head down, a look of shame in his eyes green eyes.

"I can't believe you just did that" Luke ran a hand through his messy blond hair as he continued his pacing, the old wooden floor creaking slightly under his barefoot feet as he tried to calm down, which wasn't really working at all.

He might have been born as Grimaldi but the Snyder blood was floating in his veins, and Luke Snyder hated when people tried to tell him to this and that, without him having a say in it and his fiancé wasn't an exception in any way. You would think that the guy would have figured it about by now, but oh the jealousy always gets in the way.

"I'm sorry" Reg mumble, still avoiding Luke's daggaring eyes.

"How many times do I need to tell you that every guy that walks through my grandmother's door isn't gay and "after me" Luke sighed, still pacing back and forth.

"But can you see how they look at you?" Reg tried, knowing it was useless. "They all look like they want to jump your bones right and there, in front of everyone " Reg said in a disgusted voice.

"Reg, that's enough" Luke warned, feeling how the frustration was building even more as he stopping by the bed, gazing down at his fiancé who still refused to meet his eyes."Look at me" He demaned. "Tomorrow you're going to go and apologize to Noah" He said as he started to pull out his sweatpants and t-shirt for the night.

"Or else?"

Luke slowly walked over to the door, opening it slightly "Or else there is a lovely couch downstairs just wait for you "he said, walking out of the room and closing the door with a sigh. His boyfriend never seemed to learn, and damn if Luke wasn't starting to get tired of having this conversation over and over again.

As Luke walked through the door, he could hear someone giggling and as he walked through the porch and out to the front, the giggling and whispering increased. The sight that greeted Luke was very unusual not that he was complaining in any way, on the contrary. The new handy man Noah was standing a couple of feet's away from him, lifting a bale of hay after the next one, shirtless; Luke couldn't help but to let his gaze travel as he saw Noah's very build body stretch his muscles by each movement, as if his body was used to this kind of work. Not to mention that it was in the middle of June, making Noah build up quite a sweat.

Another attack of giggle made Luke snap out of his thoughts, as he turned around to discover that it was coming from one of his younger sister.

"Look at him" She said with a dreamy look in her eyes. "Quite a handy man"

"Faith!"

"What?" She asked, looking at him. "Even you got to admit that _he's hot_" She nodded towards Noah who had his back turned away from them.

Luke opened his mouth but closed it again. "You…he..I..That…" He tried but the words weren't coming at all and his sister was smiling at him. _Okay, so he's Hot…what's the big deal?_

"Come on, he so is!"

"Th- that's not the point. You're not going after Noah" He waved his hand towards Noah. "He's too old for you"

"I'm not" She said, still looking at Noah. "I was just stating the obvious" Luke couldn't help but to roll his eye a bit on the statement, mostly because it was true. The guy was hot, straight or not.

Suddenly Noah looked up, realizing that they had company watching them and he felt himself blush for a moment as he looked at Luke, would looked like he couldn't tear his eyes of him and Faith who seemed to have the same look as Luke but it didn't take long for them to realize that they had been caught and lowed their gazed.

"What?" He couldn't help to ask with a laugh as he held Luke's gaze a little longer the necessary, starring into those chocolate eyes.

_He looks so adorable when he's blushing. _

Luke shook his head. "Nothing… We were just…" But the sentence was left unfinished as a hand grabbed Luke shoulders, causing him to lose his balance, almost falling to the ground.

"Hey Babe" Reg whispered into his ears as he tightened his hold on Luke.

"Hey" Luke smiled weakly, trying to hold back the urge to kick his fiancé in the ribs and break free from the hold.

He hated when people came and grabbed him from behind without his knowing. It reminded Luke to much of the time when he was kidnapped in Malta, and no matter if it had been years ago, the memories was still hunting him. Those simple things that he used to enjoy so much when he was a kid had instead turned into nightmares for him.

"Why isn't he wearing a shirt?" Reg asked with an angry voice, dragging a sighed from Luke as he noticed Noah standing there, starring at them with an uncomfortable look.

"It's freaking June in case you haven't noticed and lifting bales of hay isn't an easy job as sitting behind a fancy desk with a fancy suit, pretending to be someone" Noah replied short as he walked past Reg.

"Spooky" He called out with a whistle, getting a confused glance from both Luke and Reg. Out of the blue came a black and white Border collie running towards him, wagging his tall tail. "What do you say about a walk around the pond?" He asked, bending down to pet the dog and in the process getting a very wet kiss. "I'll take that as a yes" He said with a laugh as he rose from the ground, still feeling both Luke's and Reg's eyes in his back.

Reg starred after Noah and Spooky as they started to walk away but quickly turned to Luke as soon as he disappeared "I just wanted a goodbye kiss before I left forwork" Reg said with an apologizing smile as he took a step closer to Luke. Noah watched in the distant how Luke willingly leaned closer, and placed a light kiss on Reg's lips, the gesture, the flinching and the sighting not going unnoticed to Noah.

_O yeah, you can just see the love between them… _

"Come on boy" He patted the dog one more time before walking again, away from the sight that meet his eyes, the sight of Luke and his fiancé.

"Thanks, I'll see you later" He heard Reg said with a smile before walking over to the car, driving away with a cloud of dust behind him.

Luke watched as the car drown away, making sure that Reg was long gone before he turned around and started to walk the same path down to the pond that Noah had a moment ago.

"Hey" Luke said softly as he sat down beside Noah. "I'm sorry about Reg; he's usually not like that"

"Only to people like me, right?" Noah turned around so that he was facing Luke, scanning his eyes to try to read those brown eyes who he had only know for a less than twenty four hours.

_Why do you love him Luke? How can you even love him? The guy is complete jerk…_

"People like you?" Luke asked, a bit confused, what did he mean with people like him?

"You know... Gay..." Noah replied, like it was the most obvious thing in the world. "Because I'm pretty sure that if it was a girl standing on your grandmother's doorstep, he wouldn't be acting like this"

"You heard us talking, didn't you?"

Noah nodded. "It was hard not too...It was what, a 5 inch wall between us, it doesn't exactly shout privacy"

"So, did he apologize to you? Please say yes Luke's thoughts pleaded as Noah looked at him.

"I don't think that guy has ever said that he was sorry for anything he's ever done, and I don't think he would apologize even if the whole Oakdale police was threatening to throw hin jail" He let out a small chuckle as the morning conversation came back to him.

"I take that as a no…"

"Actually, I think he tried to form the words sorry, but I kind of interrupted him" Noah said in an apologizing tone. "It's not me he should apologize to…it's holden" Noah trailed off, as he turned his head away from Luke, the answer suprising Luke.

Both of them sat quite for a moment, enjoying the view. Spooky was running around chasing the ducks by the pond, barking, trying to get closer to the ducks by jumping into the water, drawing laughters out of Noah and Luke.

"Do you love him?" Noah asked, breaking the silence once more.

"What? Luke snapped his head around, looking at Noah with confusion in his brown eyes.

"Reg, do you love him? Noah asked, again.

"Yes"

"No, I mean, are you in love with him?" He tilted his head, starring at Luke with blue intensive eyes and for some reason Luke found himself lost in them.

Luke shrugged. "What's the difference?" But Noah could hear the uncertainty in his voice, as it broke just a little bit, like he was trying to push away the truth. Another silence fell around them, leaving the questions and answerers hanging in the air above.

_It makes all the difference in the world Luke…_

"Do you have someone special?" Luke asked, trying to push back the uncomfortable feeling that had started to raise his chest. _Why do I even care?_

Noah shook his head. "No, I had, but that was a long time ago" He replied sadly, avoiding Luke's eyes who seemed to be able to see right through him.

"You loved him"

"Yes I did, but as I said, that was a long time, I'm fine…"

_He's gone, just like everyone else…_

Suddenly he felt a hand on his shoulder and Luke was looking at him, again. "I'm sorry" He said softly, the hand was still on the shoulder, a feather touch.

"Don't be… It was my fault that it didn't work out"

"I don't believe that for a second" Luke said with a smile. "Who could not love you? And if this guy is too stupid to see what he had right in front of him, that's his loss."

_Why do you care Luke? Why do you care so much about me…?_

"Thanks" Noah said softly "A little late, but thank you"

"You're welcome"

The hand was still on his shoulder, not moving, just lying there, a soft and soothing touch, spreading warmth throught his whole body.

"We should get going" Luke said and brushed of the dirt from his jeans as he stood up, the hand leaving Noah's shoulder. He felt cold for a moment and empty but quickly recovered as Luke held his hand to help Noah up. He took it with a weak smile. Suddenly they were closer than before, too close.

None of them moved for a moment even if Luke's mind keep screaming at him that he shouldn't be this close, but those blue eyes kept starring, a shade darker than before and Luke felt himself falling a bit closer, stumbling into Noah. A arm came around his waist to steady him, another hand on his shoulder.

"Are you okay?" Noah breath tickled his face. He was too damn close.

"Yeah" He managed to get out.

_To close…_

"We should head back"

"Yeah" Luke said again, still not moving…

"We should move"

"Yeah"… Luke replied again, but none of them were moving, just gazing at each other, like some kind of force pulling them together. The hand on his should started to move across his shoulder blades, up to his neck, to finally settle, stroking Luke's cheek, still, none of them moving an inch.

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**Yes, I know... I stopped **_**there**_**.. As always, I love feedback.... the good, the bad and the ugly, just bring it on.. You guys who comment are amazing, and everytime I see a comment, I jump in by pure joy!**


	5. Chapter 5

**Title:** Nothing Is Ever Simple  
**Author:** Annelyn (Evelyn over at Vh..)  
**Chapter** 5/?  
**Rating: **PG-13  
**Summery:** Noah has been sent by Lucinda to break up Luke and a boyfriend she thinks is "unsutible" for her grandson..  
**Word count:** ~ 2,800  
**Disclaimer:** I don't own anything here except my own words and a handful of original characters. No copyright infringement is intended.  
**Author's notes:** so first of all, I hope people haven't forgotten about this story, however I did warn that I was going to have to leave because of my hand.. I haven't had a surgery yet, since I was just assigned a new doctor, who hopefully knows a lot more and there's still a lot of stuff that needs to be checked up before we head into another surgery.. there is a lot more at stake this time, since I'm up for round 4..

Anyway, I hope you like this chapter.. and eventually can forgive me for being so bad at updating this story! I didn't realized that it had been over 2 months since I've updated it.. Next time, just shout I bit and I usually react.. It won't be so now, hoping to be able to post a new chapter, but since I've started with a new story, I'm jumping in between them.. Can't make any promises, but here it is!|

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None of them moved for a moment even if Luke's mind keep screaming at him that he shouldn't be this close, but those blue eyes kept starring, a shade darker than before and Luke felt himself falling a bit closer, stumbling into Noah. A arm came around his waist to steady him, another hand on his shoulder.

"Are you okay?" Noah breath tickled his face. He was too damn close.

"Yeah" He managed to get out.

_To close…_

"We should head back"

"Yeah" Luke said again, still not moving…

"We should move"

"Yeah"… Luke replied again, but none of them were moving, just gazing at each other, like some kind of force pulling them together. The hand on his shoulder started to move across his shoulder blades, up to his neck, to finally settle, stroking Luke's cheek, still, none of them moving an inch.

He was so close. Their lips were just inches apart. All he had to do was to lean in a little and their lips would collide. He started to lean…

"Noah!" Holden bellowed from the stable to the pond.

Noah quickly backed away from Luke. He quickly turned around, running back to the stable as he willed his thoughts to slow down.

_Holden is not Winston!_

A panting Noah tried to convince himself as he stopped just outside the stable. As soon as he opened the door, he quickly began offering excuses before Holden even spoke a word.

"I'm so sorry, sir! I shouldn't have ran off like that. It was inexcusable. But I promise to never do anything like that ever again. If you want to fire me, I completely understand be--."

"Noah!" Holden interrupted him. His soft voice went unregistered to a panicking Noah standing in front of him. "Where were you just now?" he asked calmly.

"I was down at the pond with Spooky. But then Luke suddenly popped up from nowhere and we started to talk. I lost track of time and I'm so sorry that I didn't tell you where I was going. It won't happen again, I promise," Noah quickly explained. He held his breath as he waited for his expected punishment.

Holden took a step closer to Noah and raised his hand. Noah straightened his back and closed his eyes as he prepared for the blow he knew would come. Yet nothing happened. Noah's eyes remained shut. He waited patiently figuring Holden was preparing to strike him. He expected it. Maybe Holden wanted to try to trick him just like his own father had tried to so many times.

"Noah, look at me." Holden's voice was soft like honey. He heard Holden walking closer. "Noah, I'm not going to hurt you." Holden tried again as Noah refused to open his eyes. Instead he stood there still as a statue.

"But I did something I wasn't suppose to do. I broke the rules," Noah mumbled as his eyes now stared down at the dirt floor. "When I do, I should be punished."

"Noah. I'm not going to hit you," Holden said, taking a step forward. "If I wanted to punish you, there are other ways besides inflicting body harm." Holden hoped Noah was understanding what he was saying.

The young man took a hesitant step forward toward his boss.

"You're not going to hit me?" He asked, still not quite believing Holden. His thoughts scattered as Noah tried to recall when he had heard Holden's voice. He was at the pond and so close to kissing Luke.

_Luke! O God! I hope he understands. I reacted on pure instinct when I heard the voice…_

Closing his fists, Noah's eyes grew darker with anger as the memory hit him.

_I was that scared 18-year-old kid back home and it wasn't Holden's voice I heard. It was my dad's._

"Noah, are you OK," a worried Holden asked as he watched the new farmhand go from being petrified to something that resembled simmering anger. But there was something in Noah's eyes. He looked like he was somewhere else far away. . . and so lost.

"I'm fine," Noah replied. His mind still occupied somewhere else.

"Are you sure?"

Noah nodded. He seemed more aware of Holden and his surroundings. Noah's posture was suddenly different as he walked by Holden, picking up a bale of hay.

"Let's get back to work," he said, offering a small smile.

_Please drop it_ Noah thought._ Please don't ask._

Holden didn't. Instead they both got back to lifting hay, working quietly side by side. Each lost in their own thoughts. Noah about his father, while Holden reviewed what he had just witnessed. There was far more to Noah Mayer than just a charming smile; and Holden was determined to find out what or whom managed to hurt Noah so deeply. A raised voice shouldn't have caused Noah to jump out of his skin. That much he knew. Whatever it was, Holden concluded, it must have been bad, really bad.

Luke stared at the spot where Noah had stood just moment ago. The tall brunette had come so close to him just minutes before they were interrupted. There was no denying it. Noah Mayer had some kind of affect on him. Whatever it was, it was strong and powerful.

He laid back down in the grass trying to recreate that last moment. The sight of Noah flinching at the sound told Luke that something was very wrong. But why?

At the same time, Luke was desperately trying to ignore the feeling lingering deep within him. The way Noah with his sapphire blue eyes had been staring at him. . . There was something more then just desire within those beautiful orbs.

"Are you sure that you're OK?" Holden asked for what seemed like the 100th time.

"Yes," Noah replied with a sigh. "I already told you." Noah tried hard not sound irritated with Holden's endless query train. He had to admit though the last thing he had expected from Holden was such kindness and concern. It wasn't something Noah was used to courtesy of the colonel.

Noah sighed as he threw away another bale of hay onto the pile in the corner. Part of him was angry with himself for reacting the way he had. He had shown fear of a man who had had shown him only kindness since the day he had arrived at Snyder Farm. And yet his own dad's harsh voice kept popping up inside his head.

_Will I ever get rid of him or what he did to me and mom? What he still does to her?_

Noah looked up as the door opened and in stepped Luke.

_Probably not._ Noah saw Holden give Luke a quick hug before Luke walked towards the horses. He shared a quick smile with his father as he disappeared behind the door.

_I'll never have that with my dad. He's incapable of expressing any form of love at all. The only thing he knows is strict, rigid discipline._

Noah threw a bale harder than necessary causing it to land with a loud thud on the pile. The noise caused Holden to turn around toward Noah.

"All right there, kiddo?" Holden asked.

"Yeah," Noah admitted. "Just underestimated my strength. That's all." He tried to smile as he picked up another bale. He took great pains this time to throw the bale more carefully and soon they fell into the quite routine again, picking and throwing.

"I guess we're done here," Holden said as he threw the last bale up onto the pile. "We better get cleaned up before you know who arrives for supper. If we doubt, she'll have something more to complain about."

"I'm sorry. But who is she?" Noah asked following Holden back to the house.

"My mother-in-law, Luke's grandmother," Holden said as he held open the front door. "Otherwise known as Lucinda Walsh, president and CEO of World Wide, Inc."

"Wow," Noah said.

Act like you've never heard of her let alone met her. "What is it about her that you don't like?"

Holden's description fit Lucinda Walsh to a T. "The woman has an amazing talent of putting her nose where it doesn't belong." Holden said as Noah tried to stifle a grin.

"C'mon. Let's get washed up for dinner." Holden gave Noah a quick pat, trying to ignore the sensation of Noah freezing at the simple gesture. He could have sworn Noah was holding his breath, He dropped his hand quickly and walked into the house.

Noah watched as Holden disappeared up the back stairs. Noah walked into the kitchen and leaned against the counter. Blowing out a deep breath, he welcomed the peace and quiet.

_This is going to be a lot harder than I thought._

Ever since Lucinda had instructed Noah to be himself, he knew that nothing good could come out of it. What had just happened proved that for sure.

When he could pretended to be someone else; he could forget Noah Mayer for a while along with the childhood from hell. Being himself was starting to become way too complicated. There was no way he was letting the Snyder Family know the truth about his past…not even for his boss… Lucinda Walsh.

*

Luke may have thought Noah looked hot without his T-shirt down at the pond. But that was nothing compared to what greeted him when he entered the second floor hallway.

There stood Noah fresh from the shower with only a towel tied around his waist. Luke swallowed hard, when Noah stopped in his tracks.

"Oh God!" Noah gasped, looking straight at Luke. "I'm so sorry. I shouldn't be walking around like this. It's just that my room is right across from the bathroom."

"No… It's fine," Luke managed to utter. His eyes were captivated by Noah's chest before traveling lower and lower down that damn towel.

"OK, then. I'll see you later," Noah said, slipping into his room.

"Luke!" Lily called from downstairs. "Your grandmother is here."

Noah closed the door softly as he leaned against it. _It's a damn good thing Luke hadn't stepped any closer. God knows what could have happened._

He took a deep breath trying to slow down his heart rate before walking over to his dresser. Noah pulled out one of the plaid shirt Lucinda had purchased for him along with a fresh pair of jeans. Noah took one last look in the mirror and headed downstairs. There was Lucinda dressed in one of her designer outfits. The contrast between the richly-dressed matriarch and the lived-in farmhouse parlor was duly noted.

She sticks out like a sore thumb, Noah thought as he looked over the rest of the family. None of them were wearing anywhere near as expensive as her ensemble.

Lily and Holden were indeed so different. They had came from totally different backgrounds. Yet they had managed to end up together despite so many challenges. I'll never have that.

"Noah?" Luke's voice was soft. "There's someone I want you to meet."

Noah quietly switched his focus from Luke's parents to Lucinda.

"Lucinda Walsh." She reached her hand out to Noah.

"Noah Mayer." He was surprised to see how well she played the part of a new acquaintance. She played it so well.

"So you're the new farmhand?" She asked with an amused look.

"Yes, madam."

"He's doing great so far," Holden added.

"Yeah," Faith volunteered. "I hope he stays."

"That is unless Reg gets in one of his weird, little moods and thinks Noah is somehow going to steal Luke away or something. . ." Natalie piped up, smiling up at Noah.

"Natalie!" Luke warned his sister after glancing over at Reg.

"I knew it!" Reg gasped. "You better stay away from my husband or. . ."

"Fiancé." Noah interrupted.

"What?" Reg charged.

"You said 'husband.' Luke's your fiancé, not your husband, since you actually have to be married in order to call him husband." Noah calmly explained while watching Reg's anger level rise. "There is a big difference, you know."

"Just stay away from him."

"Well. . ." Noah began as he took a step closer to Reg. "that might be a bit of a problem."

"Why?"

_Because I've been hired to break you two up_. "This is a very small house and staying away from Luke is nearly impossible," Noah said, trying hard to break character.

"So… who's ready for dinner?" Lily stepped between them.

"Dinner sounds wonderful, Lily," Noah said as he turned away from Reg and into a beautiful pair of chocolate brown eyes.

"I'm sorry," Luke's eyes said as he walked over and sneaked his hand around Reg's waist, trying to calm him down.

"C'mon everyone. Let's eat." Lily pulled lightly at Noah's arm and led him and the others into the dining room. Noah took his place between Natalie and Faith. The two little girls beamed at being so close to the handsome new guy.

Despite having to endure Reg's dagger stares throughout dinner, Noah actually enjoyed himself. He was even sure he saw Lucinda smile once or twice at Ethan.

_It didn't use to be like this_. Noah thought as he started to help out clear the table. He had never been really able to enjoy an assignment as much as this…without paying for it.

"I hope my family didn't scare you," Luke said softly, approaching Noah.

Turning his head, Noah found Luke and he were alone in the dinning room. No other Synders nor mercifully Reg were present.

"They aren't all that bad," Luke chuckled. "I'm just glad you're still here."

"Me, too." Noah smiled.

"But you must have had a lot of crazy dinners with that former love of your life."

"What?" Noah asked a bit confused.

"You told me that he had a pretty big family like mine. So I'm guessing that there were a lot of crazy dinners back then, too."

"Oh, yeah. But it wasn't anything like this," Noah shook his head. "With Matt, it was always complicated. Every time I was there, I couldn't be myself.."

_Never have_

"I'm sorry."

"I guess that's the difference. If you truly love someone, you accept faults and all. You accept the person for who they are despite their past."

Luke remained silent as he glanced toward the doorway, where Reg stood, staring so carefully at them.

"Well . . . I think I'll head up to bed," Noah said. He glanced over to the now frowning Reg, who clearly viewed him as a threat.

"Good night then."

"Good night, Luke, I'll see you in the morning." Noah wanted to lean in and give him a quick good night hug but decided against it. It wouldn't be a good action to take especially when he saw Reg tensing up.

"I think there is something seriously wrong with your boyfriend," Noah whispered as he walked past Luke.

"For crying out loud Reg! Can't you act like a normal person for one freaking minute?" was the last thing Noah heard Luke say as he climbed the stairs.

He wasn't too surprised the following morning when he saw Reg's long legs sticking out over the arm rest to the couch, a tiny blanket covering him.

Noah heard Reg groan as he shifted, almost falling off as he tried to find a more comfortable position. He tried to hold back a grin but by the time he walked through the room, he busted out laughing.

_Victory is mine_, Noah thought as he stepped outside. "What a great start to a beautiful day.

~~~~~~

As always, I love comments! The good, the Bad and the ugly! Even three words.. Just so that I get a little insight what people think about this story, their reactions when they read, and all of that..

Oh, and before I forget to say this.. You people are amazing!


	6. Chapter 6

**Nothing Is Ever Simple ****Chapter 6**

**At: Okay, so it seems that the fans over at Nukefic has forgiven me, and I'm hoping that you all will too.. I'm going to say it again, I did warn I was going to be away, and I know it will happened again since I'm having a surgery and all.. But know that I'm back, I'm going to update at least once a week, between Fridays and Sundays... I give you my word on that **

**Anyway, it's the end of the week, and a new chapter has arrived! Enjoy everyone! **

**_____**

"**Spooky… Here Spooky." Noah called and whistled for the Snyder's Border Collie as he closed the door to the barn.**

**Seconds later Spooky came rushing out of the nearby woods, his long tail waging as he stopped right in front of Noah. Spooky's big pair of brown eyes stared ever so hopeful back at Noah.**

"**How about a walk around the pond, huh?" Noah asked certain that Spooky knew what he was saying. The dog started barking and running toward the pond. Spooky knew there had to be some ducks waiting there for him. Noah enjoyed these long walks with Spooky. It offered a freedom Noah had never known. Where Spooky might hope to find ducks gliding on the water, Noah secretly wished he'd find Luke sitting on the banks.**

**And he was right. Under a big oak tree near the water's edge sat Luke appearing to be deep in thought as he skipped stone after stone across the pond.**

"**Hope I'm not interrupting," Noah said softly as he walked closer to where Luke was sitting. **

**Luke turned his head at the voice and for a moment he feared that it was Reg. But when he saw Noah, he immediately broke out into a smile. **

'**How could I even have thought that it was Reg,' Luke thought gazing at Noah coming closer. Reg never came down to the pond. **

"**Hey," Luke said as Noah stopped in front of him. **

"**Hey," Noah sat down. "Are you OK?" He asked, a hint of concern in his voice as his eyes narrowed. **

"**Why wouldn't I be fine?" **

**Noah shrugged. "You just looked so sad for a moment." **

"**I'm fine" Luke replied, trying to keep his soft voice. It wasn't Noah's fault that he had managed to see inside Luke's mind for a brief moment. **

**Noah shifted a little closer to Luke.**

"**Has it got something to do with Reg?" Noah asked, refusing to drop the subject. He also tried to ignore the strange feeling that filled him every time he said Reg's name. "Perhaps something to do with why Reg has been sleeping on the couch lately?"**

"**Maybe," Luke muttered quietly as he focused his gaze on Spooky." I just don't get why he gets so d'amn jealous every time there's a new hired hand staying here." A frustrated Luke ran a hand through his hair." It might have seemed sweet and adorable in the beginning. But now… it's really starting to piss me off." **

"**Then why do you love him?" **

"**I don't know" Luke sighed. He wondered for a moment if this was what loving someone was all about. "Right now, I really done know." His tone had suddenly gone from angry to sad. It didn't feel like this with Noah, He didn't have to watch his every move. It was just simple, easier in fact with Noah.**

**Noah watched him for a moment as so many emotions cross Luke's face. Standing up, Noah reached out his hand to Luke. "Come on." **

"**What?" He asked puzzled. **

"**Sitting here feeling sorry for yourself won't solve whatever problems you and Reg have." **

"**Says who?" **

"**Says me. Now, come on!" **

**Luke reluctantly grabbed Noah's hand and rose from the grass. He quickly brushed his pants before following Noah. **

'**I can't believe I'm doing this, playing peacemaker between them,' Noah thought as he and Luke walked back to the barn. 'But I hate seeing Luke suffer like this. My father may have been a cold-hearted man. But I'm be damned if I turn out to be just like him.'**

**He opened the door and held it for Luke to step through first. **

"**Such a gentleman," Luke said with a smile. He couldn't help to blush just a little bit as he walked past Noah. He was definitely feeling a lot better. Almost every thought of Reg has vanished from his mind. . .well almost. **

"**What are we doing here?" Luke asked as he stopped outside Ivanhoe's stall.**

**Noah leaned against the wall. "I thought that we could to for a ride." **

**Luke raised an eyebrow. "I didn't know you could ride," he said as he bent down to pick up the brushes, handing a pair to Noah, who was following his movements. **

"**It's something I picked up a long time ago," Noah said, trying to suppress a bit of sadness. He opened the door to Nero's stall. "It was something my mom and I used to do when my dad was away." he added much to his own surprise. **

**´Too personal Mayer,´ his mind warned him. **

"**Was your dad away a lot when you were young?" Luke asked turning around to look at Noah and to return the brushes to where they belonged. **

**Noah raised his hand. "Army brat here." He sounded almost guilty as he disappeared to get the saddles. A part of him hoped Luke wouldn't probe any deeper.**

"**Oh," Luke replied softly. **

"**Ready to head out?" Noah asked as he past Luke while leading Nico through the stable. **

"**Yup" He answered with a small smile as he followed Noah out to the yard. **

*** **

**Later that same day…**

"**Thank you," Luke said as they rode back to the farm. The roof on the Snyder's barn offered a hint of home not far off in the distance. "I've hadn't had this much fun since…" Luke paused. " I don't know when." **

**Noah took in Luke's bright smile; his red cheeks; and his sparkling eyes. 'I didn't know eyes could sparkle like that.' **

"**Anytime, Luke," Noah said, smiling back before they got into a smooth trot. **

**Noah had almost forgot how much fun horseback riding could be. It gave him such a sense of freedom. It was like every thought he carried inside himself just simply disappeared. For an hour or longer, he could just be in the moment. He could forget everything else making the world appear not to be such a messed up place.**

**With the barn now just a couple of meters away, they stopped their horses, dismounted and taking the reins led Nico and Ivanhoe into their respective stalls. **

"**Were you serious just now?" Luke asked as he hung up the saddle. **

**Noah turned around and faced Luke. "About what?"**

"**About going riding with me." He paused as he looked into Noah's eyes, trying to get a read on the young man. Noah was so unlike his fiancé. He had managed to capture his heart, even if his mind still hadn't gotten the memo. "Did you mean it?" **

"**Of course," Noah said. His face softened when Luke shook his head slightly. **

"**What?" **

"**It's just. . ." He began and shook his head again. "You're so unlike Reg. You are that kind person I would have sought out years ago."**

"**What kind of person is that?" Noah couldn't help to ask, not understanding where Luke was going with this train of thought. **

"**Someone who's honest and kind; who cares more about others than themselves." He paused, trying to find the right words. "Someone like you, Noah Mayer." **

"**Oh, stop it," Noah's eyes suddenly fell to the barn's stone floor. "You're going to make be blush if you keep this up." True to his own words, a hint of pink spread across his face." "What changed?" He asked, trying to steer the conversation away from him. **

**Luke shrugged. "I learned the hard way that even the good, charming guys had secrets; and their secrets always ended up with me getting my heart broken." **

"**And the bad ones were better. . . How was that possible?" **

"**At least then I knew what to expect from the beginning excess baggage and all.." Luke sighed. "And let me tell you I've dated some pretty weird guys." **

"**Exactly how do you know that I'm not one of those bad guys?" Noah asked taking a step closer to Luke. **

"**You're not." Luke shook his head. **

**Noah tilted his head as he gazed into Luke's eyes. "How do you know?" **

"**Because I can see it in your eyes, Noah" Luke replied as he watched a nervous Noah swallow hard. "I think something really bad happened to you when you were little. Somewhere behind all that politeness you wear like a suit of armor, is a lost boy, who hasn't stopped running from whatever hurt him so much." **

"**And what would that be?" Noah's voice was barely a whisper. **

**Luke's observation was hitting close to home. In a matter of seconds Luke had managed to hit every nerve inside of him, striking down his walls. Noah knew on some level, Luke could see that scared little boy who always ran away from Daddy. **

**It scared Noah because Luke, along with Matt - another one of his jobs, had reached beyond Noah's defenses. But Matt saw what he wanted to see, and in the end it hadn't been Noah Mayer, despite the honesty once shared between them.**

**The old stable door creaked open then as a woman's voice was heard. "Hello?" Noah froze at the sound. **

"**It can't be!" He heard light footsteps echoing though the stables as the person walked across the stone floor, getting closer and closer to where Luke and Noah are standing.**

**Noah prayed that the woman would turn around and walk away. But the stronger part of him was willing to take the pain, if it turned out that the woman turned out to be who he thought she was. **

**Noah looked over to see that Luke hadn't moved an inch and appeared to be holding his breath as well. That surprised Noah, already tense and focused on the person drawing ever closer. **

**The door opened causing both Luke and Noah to jump.**

**She stood there with the same soft brown hair, eyes that never judged him and a smile that could banish all his problems at least for one peaceful moment. **

"**Oh, my god," she gasped. "You're alive!" She rushed into Noah's arms. **

"**Maddie, I'm fine," he whispered, trying to comfort the now crying girl in a tightening embrace. He hadn't seen his best friend since the night he told her he was finally going to come out to his father. He knew she had carried the events of that horrible night with her all these years... **

**__________**

**I don't have to remind you that comments means the world to me, do I ? Just bring it on, the good and the bad..**


	7. Chapter 7

**An: Once again, I almost forgot about this story, but I've managed to sort some my life out, at least a bit more, so this story is getting back the attention that it needs.. I can only say how sorry I am for the delay, and I offer Cookies... **

Maddie held Noah's arm tightly as they silently walked down to the pond. Hopefully, no one would disturb them there.

He wasn't sure if he was overjoyed or scared to have his former best friend step back into his life. Noah tried to focus on Maddie and their relationship. But a part of him was still thinking about a very confused Luke left back in the barn.

He knew he owned him some kind of explanation. But what could he say? He couldn't tell Luke about his crazy father and his relentless pursuit to track down his lost son.

He felt Maddie stop, and for the first time since they meet, he really took time to really look at her face. He tried to read those eyes he once knew now brimming with tears.

"Oh Maddie." Noah took a step closer to comfort her. He had never imagine to stand here and watch his best friend cry because of something he did.

Noah's heart broke a little as Maddie backed away.

"Don't." She mumbled, her voice cracking."Just don't." She said again with more fire in her voice. "I'm not upset."

Yeah, I can see that," He said, trying to hold himself back. "But you have every right to be upset with me, Maddie considering the way I just took off."

"_I can't keep lying to him Maddie" Noah said as he starred back at his own reflection before glancing at Maddie who was standing there with crossed arms and a look of fear in her eyes. She looked worse then what Noah was feeling at the moment. Despite the fear and terror that was glowing in her eyes, her voice remained soft as she spoke_

_Despite the fear and terror, her voice remained soft._

"_Noah, you don't have to tell the whole world in one day." She reached an arm around him, giving every drop of love and comfort she could in the small gesture._

"_If I don't tell him today, Maddie, he'll send me to away tonight. I've been lying to them long enough. It's better to get this part over with." He splashed some cold water over his face to calm him down. He turned toward the door._

_She grabbed hold of his arm. "He'll kill you if he finds out that you've been lying to him"_

"_No, he won't!"_

"_Noah, don't you dare start lying to me now," she growled._

"_I'm not."_

"_Your eyes tell a different story." She dragged him towards the couch; both of them knew that their time together would end soon in a not so good way._

"_If you're certain that you're going to do this today, then I'm coming with you." Maddie felt Noah's body tensed up. His head snapped up to meet her gaze._

"_That's out of the question," he growled, glaring back at her._

_Blue eyes meet brown ones. Noah could see the determination in Maddie's eyes and he knew how stubborn she could be. But he had to fight this battle on his own no matter how much he wanted her by his side._

_Noah's hands shook as he reached out and grabbed hers._

" _I love you Maddie," he began, kissing her hand. "I love that you're willing to stand up to my father, right there with me. I love how passionate you are and how you always think the best of everyone even my dad._

"_Only sometimes," she added, attempting to smile._

"…_most times," Noah chuckled. "I love you for who you are and I'm not about to let him destroy everything that makes you the wonderful person you are._

_He hoped she would get the message and stay home. She was too important to him. "In case something would happened to me. . ." Noah swallowed trying to hold back his own tears. "I don't want you to witness it because it would destroy you Maddie. We both know that."_

"_Just knowing you're here for me is enough for me, " Noah lied._

_Maddie glanced back at Noah's seemingly begging eyes. She nodded. "Do what you have to do Mayer."_

_After a silent pause, Maddie spoke again._

"_I know you're tired of lying to everyone about who you are. You shouldn't have to lie in the first place. Be damn proud, Mayer, of who you are."_

_"I am."_

"_Good. Just promise me one thing before you walk out that door."_

"_What?"_

"_Whatever happens after you tell him, you get your butt back over here."_

_They stood up and walked over to the door._

"_Got it" He leaned in and hugged her tightly._

_Noah knew there was no turning back. He was changing his life for the better he hoped. But it would never be the same. A part of him knew that this was a good bye, just in case something could happen._

"_Be careful," Maddie whispered as she gave another him a quick hug._

"_I will," he whispered back as he stepped through the door._

_Maddie leaned against the door frame and as she watched her best friend walk out of sight. The bad feeling in her stomach refused to disappear. Something was going to happened today; and whatever it was, it wasn't good._

"_Sit up straight, boy" Winston yelled as he picked up his fork and knife. Noah tried not to wince at the way he emphasize the word straight. It was almost as if his dad knew. He caught his mom's apologizing look before picking up the utensils._

"_The army is going to set you straight, Noah. It's going to make you become a real man," Winston said proudly as he chewed a piece of steak._

'_I'm already a man,' his mind protested despite Noah's head nodding toward his father. He never talked back._

"_It'll teach you that this silly dream of working in the entertainment business is just a waste of time. It won't get you anywhere. The army is exactly what you need."_

_Noah clenched his jaw so tightly to where it started to hurt._

'_Please, just shut up,' He silently prayed. But his dad seemed nowhere finished telling him how little of a man he truly was._

"_Not like that.. . .that Simon boy you keep hanging around."_

_Noah froze in his chair. Could his dad possibly know? But whatever he knew didn't matter._

"_Stop it," He said, glaring and rising from his seat._

"_What did you say, boy?" charged Winston getting up and walking toward Noah._

"_You heard me," Noah answered. "You have no right to talk to me or Simon like that." He started backing away putting as much distance as he could from his father._

"_How dare you talk to your father like that?"_

_The burst of anger Noah had felt a moment ago disappeared. And once again a scared little boy stood there about to face the consequences._

"_Answer me, Noah! Winston screamed as he took another step forward._

_Noah knew he should have hidden within himself like he had before when that voice spread across the room, crushing everything in its path. He should have muttered some kind of an apology and backed away. But for the first time, and probably the last, the voice didn't have an effect on him. Noah didn't wince or back away. Instead he lifted his gaze from the floor and looked directly at his father. Winston looked like he was going implode at any second. But Noah honestly didn't care. Damn the consequences._

"_Damn it! Noah, answer me! Is that any way to speak to your father?"_

_Noah gritted his teeth as he meet his father's gaze._

"_No sir," he said. Noah hesitated for a moment before turning around to leave the kitchen. He was vaguely aware of his mother's presence near him._

_For a moment, he didn't understand why she looked so scared until he found himself on the floor. His head burned with a sting of pain._

"_Don't turn your back on me!" Winston spat._

"_I already have," Noah said, spitting out a trickle of blood. The son's reply caught the father, with his hand raised about to strike by surprised._

"_What?"_

"_Let me tell you a little secret, Dad." Noah walked toward his father. For a second, he could have sworn he saw fear in the older man's eyes._

"_I'm gay" Noah said in a steady voice._

_The room suddenly turned very quiet and Noah shifted uncomfortably. He had expected his dad to be start yelling by now. But not a sound came from Winston's lips. Instead, he just… stood there looking in wonder at his son._

"_That was a good one, Noah" Winston laughed. "You almost had me going there…"_

"_I'm not joking"_

"_But you have a girlfriend." Winston charged. "You and Maddie have been together for almost a year now. You're going to be moving in together"_

"_It was all a lie" Noah said quietly. "We knew that you had to suspect something after you found me and Simon in my room. So Maddie and I pretended to be a couple. And by the looks of it, we did a damn good job."_

_He was met once more with silence. Noah grew really nervous. Where was the yelling about right and wrong? Why wasn't he yelling about how shameful and disgusting it was to be gay. Instead, his father remained silent as his gaze shifted between Noah and the door._

"_Please Dad, say something!" Noah pleaded. He would rather take hurtful words and punishment than this painful silence. This he did not recognize. This wasn't the man who raised him. Where were the speeches about being a man? Where was the anger and rage? Where the hell had his dad gone? Who was this stranger standing before him?_

"_What do you want me to say here, Noah?" Winston asked calmly as he threw his hand up in apparent surrender. "I'm still hoping you'll tell me this is some kind of sick joke."_

_Noah felt the anger rise again. The fact that he had just said he was gay didn't seem to register with the old man._

_The roles were now reversed._

"_Sorry to disappoint you, dad. But no matter how hard you try to fool yourself this is just a joke. The facts still stand."_

_"And those facts would be what exactly?" Winston grumbled._

"_Oh God, here it comes," Noah thought as he saw the change in his father's eyes. Once again, that familiar sense of fear crept under Noah's skin._

"_Winston, please!" He heard his mom's voice in the background, begging him not to harm their son. It warmed Noah's heart to hear his mother attempting to stand up for him all the time knowing the kind gesture would not be accepted._

_All the same what she had done, those simple two words, meant something. She was accepting him for who he was. No questions asked._

"_Shut up!" Winston yelled. "I. WILL. NOT. HAVE. A. FAGGOT. FOR. A. SON." He walked closer to Noah._

"_Don't let him win Noah!" He heard Maddie's voice in his head. "Fight for the right to be yourself."_

"_Lucky for you, Winston" Noah paused for a moment, feeling how the new name tasted to say. Judging by the older man's reaction, he was doing something right. "I don't want to be your son."_

_He glared angrily at his new found enemy, and for the first time felt a weight lifted off of his shoulders. The responsibly, rules, honor and all the other things his father had tried to drum into him disappeared. All that was left was Noah Mayer, his own person._

_Despite the newfound freedom, Noah couldn't help but swallow hard as he watched Winston getting close. Like a hunter waiting to attack, he moved to block the door._

"_If you want to leave this house and never come back, you can. But you're going to have to fight for it," Winston said with a evil grin._

"_You know," Noah responded, crossing his arms. " …trying to scare me isn't going to change the fact that I'm gay."_

_Winston winced at the mention of what he considered a dirty three-letter word._

"_You'll try every way to erase this silly little joke as you put it. That's who you are Winston. You can't accept something bucks your set of rules and regulations. Sorry to disappoint you. But this is the one thing you can't change. I was born this way."_

_Noah paused long enough to study the man he formerly called father. He was surprised to see he actually seemed to be paying attention to what he said._

"_Fine!" Winston mumbled as he stepped aside._

"_What?"_

"_You heard me boy. If you want to go, then go"_

_Noah took a hesitant step forward, not breaking eye contact as he moved closer to the door._

"_Go already!" Winston shouted._

"_Don't let him get close to you. Don't let him." His mind warned him_

_Winston didn't move as Noah passed him. He glanced toward Winston, stopping for a second. There was no longer anger in his eyes. In fact, there was no emotion at all. Just a pair of dark orbs staring back at him._

_It wasn't until he had walked out of the house and toward Maddie's home that Noah realized he had been holding his breath all the while._

_Noah replayed what had just happened. He knew this wasn't over…not by a long knew that the man he used to call his father was capable of so much more. He had to have something up his sleeve. The only question was what?_

"_You're alive!" She grabbed him and hugged him tightly in relief. He was OK, more than OK._

_Maddie frowned at the thought and let him go, but only to examine him more closely._

"_You're not hurt." The frown was still there as her hands touched his body in search of wounds._

" _Not even a scratch…"_

_"So... I'm guessing it went well?" Maddie asked, "As well as could be expected. But he's up to something."_

" _I know."_

_"But what?" The question crossed both minds._

"_How far do you think he'll go?" Maddie whispered. They both knew that he wasn't going to let go as easy as he was pretending to do. This was Winston Mayer after all._

_Noah sighed, feeling a headache coming on._

"_I honestly don't know Maddie," he finally said. "But whatever it is, let him try. This is who I am and there is no way I'm going back."_

_"There are other ways to hurt you, you know," Maddie pointed out. "It's not just about you being gay. You disobeyed orders tonight."_

_As he listened to what she was saying, Noah knew all too well that they couldn't let down their guard._

"_Until we know what he's up to, I want you promise you'll be careful, Maddie. He might come after you in a way to get to me" Noah pleaded as he looked toward the window. For a moment he thought he seen something. Perhaps it was just the wind playing on his fears._

"_I promise."_

_They didn't talk about it anymore that night, nor the following night. In fact, it had almost slipped away. Just a drifting thought now and then._

_Until three weeks later…_

"_Noah" Maddie called out loudly as she looked down at the newspaper in her hand, reading through the article one more time. A minute swept by without a sign of Noah._

_Maddie called out again only louder this time._

_Out of nowhere, Noah's head popped up._

"_What is it?" he asked with a smile, which quickly vanished when he saw Maddie face._

"_Take a look at this." Her voice trembled as she handed him the newspaper._

_The headline read Local Boy Found Dead._

"_**The body found near Long Lake has been identified as Simon Adams, reported missing 24 hours ago. Police officials say there are indications the young boy was the victim of a hate crime. The investigation continues…"**_

"_So this is how you punish me, huh?" He tossed the newspaper aside and started to pace._

"_Noah, calm down for a sec," Maddie tried, knowing it was a useless request. "We don't know if he did this."_

"_Oh, he did this all right," Noah muttered angry. "They're calling it a hate crime Maddie… a hate crime! It was Simon, for God's sake! Who else could it be if not him!_

"_But why?"_

"_Isn't it obvious?" Noah turned and looked at Maddie. "He's punishing me in every way he can starting with Simon. He's trying to hurt the persons who mean the most to me."_

"…_like Simon?"_

"_Yes. Like Simon," he said with a deep sigh as he sat down on the couch. Maddie gazed at him with a concerned look. He looked so tired and so much older than 18._

"_Hey!" She grabbed his arm, forcing him to look at her. "We're going to figure this out."_

_Noah lifted his head and looked at her with such empty eyes._

"_How?" He asked as he pulled away from the touch._

"_We'll find a way."_

"_Maddie, He murdered someone, just to get even with me. How do we find a way to figure this out?" Noah asked in a cold, hard voice._

_Maddie lowered her gaze. This was a new side she saw from Noah, and for a second, just a second, he looked so much like the father he had grown to hate._

"_I don't know," she said quietly, refusing to see those cold blue eyes._

"_Don't you understand Maddie?" His voice cracked. "He's never going to stop. He'll keep this up until everyone I love is gone…killed. This is my final punishment from him."_

_Now it was Maddie turn to let loose with her own anger toward Noah's father._

"_You don't deserve to be punished. If anyone should be, it's him. Not you or me." She lifted his chin until his eyes met hers. "Not you. Got that?"_

_Noah wiped away a threatening tear._

"_Got it," He answered before pulling Maddie into a hug. "Thank you,"_

"_You're welcome," she mumbled. They sat there together for a long time in comfort wrapped like a blanket around them._

_Noah suddenly pulled back._

"_I have to go and see him," he said quietly with his head down. He couldn't face looking directly at her. If he did, he wouldn't go through with his plan. "You can't change my mind, Maddie. I'm going to see him and that's final."_

_He heard Maddie sigh and looked up to meet her gaze._

"_Fine," she muttered. "He's your father and you know how to deal with him, I guess. Even if this is a crazy and insane idea, we both know it needs to be done."_

_Silence filled the room for a moment._

_Then Maddie whispered "He's going to hurt you."_

"_I know."_

"_But you're still coming back, right? Right?"_

"_I will."_

_Noah and Maddie stood up to embrace each other before Noah left._

_She hoped he would come back to her safe and sound as he had done before. But the hours were on as she waited for him to step though the door. Two hours became four. Four hours grew to six and soon the hours grew to days. Days grew months, months to years._

"What happened Noah?" Maddie asked as she took a step closer to him and for a moment they just stood there. It was as if the intervening years had never happened. They hadn't been separated. But yet that's exactly what happened.

All the anger was still there. Everything they used to be was gone. Instead, the two now strangers looked at each other trying to understand what went so wrong,

"I know that I owe you a explanation…several in fact."

"Yes, you do." Maddie agreed.

"But, I just can't."

"Why not?" She asked, crossing her arms and glared angry at him. "I thought he had killed you Noah." Her voice cracked." I keep waiting and waiting, watching, searching, hoping and praying to God you were alive."

She tried blinking away the tears, those damn tears. She was so glad to see him alive. But it hurt her deeply he couldn't explain things to her.

"I know."

"You've changed," Maddie said. She took a good look at him, and the man that stood in front of her wasn't the old Noah Mayer.

"What the hell did he do to you?" she asked herself as she looked at what was left of her best friend.

"Hey," Luke said softly as he sat down beside Noah. He tried to ignore the sensation of Noah's arm brushing against his. That feeling and touch alone made him feel more than he had ever had with Reg. "Where is Maddie?"

"She left," Noah mumbled, keeping his gaze on the pond.

"Are you two OK?"

Noah shook his head. "No. But we will be. We just need a little bit of time to patch things up. A lot has happened since I last saw her."

"But she's your best friend, you're not going to let go of her, right?"

"No, I'm not." Noah said keeping his eyes fixed on the pond rather than looking deep into Luke's chocolate brown eyes. To do so would break down his last defense against telling Luke everything. He couldn't do that.

"You don't sound convinced."

"It's just so" Noah drew a hand through his hair, searching for the right word. "…complicated and messed up between us. I know I hurt her deeply and I would do anything to take it all back. But I'm not sure if there is a way to repair the damage I've caused."

With Maddie back in the picture, everything was suddenly changed. And there was Luke to consider. Noah glanced at him.

The day's events had been so draining. All he wanted was to find a safe place to call his mom.

As he was about to leave, a warm hand gripped his arm. He looked up to be comforted by a pair of warm brown pair of eyes appearing as if they understood on some level.

"C'mon, Noah. Talk to me." The hand was still there and Noah couldn't help but notice the difference between now and the last time they were this close.

Something in Luke's eyes was telling Noah that Luke wouldn't let him run away from him again.

". . .and don't give me a 'I can't.' I'm here, Noah. I know you need someone because I can see in your eyes how lonely and hurt you are."

Noah swallowed hard. Matt, who had once been the love of his life, had never offered this kind of loving gesture.

"How can you offer me something like that, when you barely know me? How can your heart be so pure, when the rest of the world is not? How can you?"

"Because I do care about you, Noah. For whatever reason, even though I barely know you, I care about you."

Noah felt Luke move away from his side to right in front of him.

"You're a good man and the fact that you're trying everything to reestablish that friendship, proves it."

Noah stood there speechless. He wasn't used to this.

"Just talk to her. Don't shut her out"

"It's not that simple."

"Why not?" Luke argued back.

How could he tell about how Winston had beaten him up to within a breathe of his life. That his father actually tried to kill him. That the only reasons he was able to get out of there was alive. . .was his mother taking a bullet meant for him.

"Because nothing is ever simple, " Noah said silently swearing he could hear Winston whispering in his ear.

"Don't let your dad get in the way of doing what is right." Luke said softy feeling like he had probably crossed the line between them.

"You don't know what you're talking about" He said in a low voice. "You just don't."

Luke saw a fire in Noah's eyes… something he had never seen.

"Then talk to me Noah. Talk to Maddie! Let someone know what's going on inside that head of yours" Luke grabbed a hold of Noah's arms, pulling him closer. "Please," he begged. "I hate seeing you like this."

"Like what?" Noah snapped. He was tired of these conversations about him and his life. "You don't know a thing about me or my problems. I prefer to keep it that way."

He pulled out of Luke's hold and turned to walk away. Right now he felt like a small child, wanting more than anything a mother's love and comfort.

"I'm sorry Luke." Noah left leaving a hurt Luke.

"I hate seeing you so sad," Luke whispered.

Maddie had watched all of this from distance. She didn't miss seeing Luke's hurt face or Noah's for that matter. Despite the hurt faces and angry words, she knew there was something going on between them. She had seen it with her own two eyes.

"Oh you silly boys."


	8. Chapter 8

The pond was quite now; the water still and peace like. And for a moment, you could believe all was right with the world.

But the truth was far from it. Nothing was right any more. Perhaps it never was. How long can you live hiding away from people you love? How long can you pretend to be someone you're not? How can you live as a distant lonely shadow in a world where you don't think you belong.

Noah kicked a rock and watched it fly into the water, breaking the stillness and spreading out endless ripples. Things weren't supposed to be like this. Nothing like this should ever have happened. In one moment, his own world had changed into something he had no idea how to handle.

_I wish I had never been born this different. I wish I had stood up to my father instead of running away as far as I possibly could and leaving my mom alone and defenseless against that bastard._

_I wish I had never meet Lucinda Walsh and agreed to take this case. I wish for so many things to somehow turn back the clock and let me start all over again._

_But most of all, I wish I had never meet Luke Snyder. . .the boy with the golden eyes. If I had never met him, I wouldn't feel like this. I wouldn't be in love with a person I know I can never be with._

"But we can't change who we are because it is who we were born to be," Noah mumbled with a sigh. That was something his mom would say. She would tell him stand up and look around to see what he could change and try to become the person he wanted to be. And if he looked closer, he'd see he was still perfect in her eyes. He was still her Noah.

But his mom wasn't here. He hadn't laid eyes on her in such a long time.

There had been a few phone calls here and there. But the last time they saw each other was that day, five years ago, in their kitchen when she sacrificed her own freedom for his.

He picked up the cell phone Lucinda had given him and flipped it around in his hand all the while starring at it. It would be so easy to call home. To hear her voice again; and to get rid of this feeling of being so alone in all of this.

She was a victim as much as he. The only difference was she was there trapped with his father and he was here. . .running. There was no freedom in that. None whatsoever. He hadn't known freedom in a long time. But this wasn't about that or maybe it was on some level. He was scared of what the changes would bring, if he allowed his mind to actually confess to his heart that he was in love with Luke. This whole thing could either end up with him having a normal life or breaking another guy's heart.

He didn't want to hurt Luke. Anyone but him…another young man who had been nothing but kind with him since the minute he got to the farm.

His fingers seemingly acting on their own quickly pressed the number. Before Noah knew it, he heard his mom on the other end.

"Noah, is everything OK?" He could hear the fear in her voice. She was constantly wondering about how he was doing and praying for him.

Noah silently nodded. He wasn't sure if his voice would hold if he tried to speak.

"Yeah" he managed.

"Honey, what's wrong?"

"Nothing," he whispered. His hand moving to scratch his head, hoping she'd believe him. "Nothing at all. I just wanted to hear your voice." His voice cracked slightly as he felt the tears trying to break free. "I miss you Mom. I miss seeing your face, and I miss those hugs you'd give me when I was a little boy. I just miss you."

"I miss you too, Noah. More than anything I wish I could see your handsome face right now. My grown up boy." Her voice was weak. But her words acted as a wrench clamping down around Noah's already aching heart.

"Are you safe?"

"No, not yet. But they're working on it which means you took that job despite what I told you." She wasn't judging him. But he could still hear her disapproval of the choices he made.

"Yes." There was no point in lying to her. She somehow always knew what his heart wasn't telling her.

"Noah!" she protested loudly. "One way or another you're going to get hurt. This job is going to end up killing you."

"It already has," he confessed. "I fell in love with him. I didn't mean to. I hardly know the guy and I want to… I need to get rid of these fucking feelings for him. They are getting in the way."

He felt the hair stand up on the back of his neck. "I'd give anything to stop feeling like my heart is going jump out of my chest every time I see him walk by. I know what this is leading, I don't want to hurt him. Not him. I wasn't supposed to like him let alone fall in love with him."

"Oh honey," she sighed. "We can't control who we fall in love with. It's those feelings that separate us from the others."

"But Mom. . .what can _I_ offer Luke. . .only despair and misery?"

"Oh my beautiful, handsome son. Don't let your father continue to control your life. Stop running. True love comes but once in a person's life. Treasure this moment and don't ever let it go. He'll never understand this Noah, and that's what makes you different from him. It's one of the many ways you are not your father.

"Take this chance and let your heart fall in love." She let out a nervous laugh. "It's not like you can stop it anyway. This is one of those things that the human race can't control."

Noah could hear his father's voice in the background. "I'm sorry but I have to go. He's calling me," she whispered and hung up.

With a sigh, Noah shut his phone and looked out over the pond. It was such a beautiful and peaceful place. It gave him the chance to believe in the things he usually dismissed.

Perhaps it wasn't impossible for someone to fall in love or take a chance. Maybe just maybe some things could turn out all right in the end. Maybe the life someone's living wasn't a complete waste of breath after all.

With hands in her pockets, Maddie opened the creaky barn door and slowly walked in. She knew he would be in here hidden away from the world for the moment. Her footsteps echoed as she walked through the stable looking for him.

Her posture relaxed as she saw him, standing outside Snow White's stall, his chin resting against her white head, with his eyes closed. He looks so sad, she thought as she drew closer.

"Hey!"

Luke's eyes snapped open. His gaze quickly soften as he looked in her direction.

"Hey," he mumbled back.

"You OK?" she asked taking a step closer and gently patting Snow White. "I saw you and Noah at the pond earlier. You looked upset when you walked away."

"It's nothing," he shrugged and turned his back to brush the horse with a steady and fast hand.

"Luke!" Maddie glared at him.

"OK, maybe it was something," he sounded defeated starring down at the barn floor, "not like it matters now anyway. What Noah and I had is gone… if there ever was something there to begin with."

"It still there Luke. I saw it with my own eyes."

Her now confused, scared friend looked up. "Why are you here Maddie? Is it about Reg again?"

"You're damn right it's about Reg! I can't believe you're still with that jerk let alone planning on marrying him. What happened Luke? I thought you were smarter than that."

"I love him," said Luke sounding like he was trying to convince himself as well as Maddie

"Oh yeah?" She stepped closer and crossed her arms. "How about looking at me when you say that."

"I do," he weakly protested.

"No. You don't! Remember Kevin? What you had with him was love. What you have with Reg…," she shook her head. "I don't know what to call it. But it's definitely not love. Why you've stayed with him all these years after what he did to Kevin and to me is beyond me."

"That's my business," Luke muttered angry.

"Love isn't supposed to be a chore, Luke"

"Why do you even care Maddie?" He tilted his head. "You left years ago for college. What gives you the right to come back after all these years and tell me what I feel and don't feel?"

"Because you're making a mistake Luke, a big one and you've got to realize it before it's too late." Shaking her head, Maddie reached up to gently rub Snow White. "What about Noah. Are you seriously telling me you don't feel anything when you're with him?"

"I. . . I don't know what I feel when I'm around Noah," he shook his head. "It's complicated. I admit I feel different when I'm with him."

"And?" she pushed.

"And nothing," he shrugged turning his attention back to Snow White. "Who is Noah to you anyway? I saw the look on your face when you saw him for the first time in years. It was like you couldn't believe your eyes."

"It's complicated," Maddie now felt pressured. "Let's just say this was the last place I thought I'd find Noah working as a handy man of all things. He was so talented, and if he had been given the chance, Noah would have become a great director."

"Well… What happened?"

"His dad. That's what happened. They never really got along, and when Noah came out to him, everything changed. His father kicked him out. . .disowned him," she explained. "Noah couldn't afford the tuition for school on his own. So he had to drop out."

Maddie bit her bottom lip on that last part. It was a lie. She wanted to tell Luke about that night when they found Simon murdered. It was then that Noah decided to face his dad.

"Poor Noah. What happened after that?"

"I didn't hear a word from him until now" Maddie said sadly as she patted the gentle horse. Resting her head head against Maddie, Snow seemed to sense the young girl's conflicted feelings.

"That would explain a lot" Luke said more to himself than to Maddie.

"Please don't tell him I told you any of this. It's his story to tell, not mine."

Luke shook his head. " I won't say a word." A part of him felt better and understood Noah's reaction at the pond. But he still felt hurt.

"I think you're making a mistake, marrying Reg. But it's your life so I shouldn't tell you what to do. Just be absolutely sure, Luke that Reg is really the one for you." Maddie gave Snow white a last pat before leaving the stable with Luke watching her all the way to the door.

She wasn't surprised when she found Noah sitting in the same spot by the pond where she had left him hours earlier**.** He was having one hell of a rough day. Yet despite the tension between them, she wasn't about to leave her best friend's side.

There would never be enough time to replace the hours she had waited for him, prayed for him. Yet here he was now, sitting on the grass deep in his own thoughts.

That was all that mattered for now. She vowed to do everything she could to help heal his damaged heart.

"Hey," Maddie softly said as she sat down next to him and gazed out over the pond. This was the reunion they should have had, just to sit next to each other and just be. But that was impossible now.

"I thought you left," Noah starring straight ahead.

"I came back."

"Obviously but why?" He folded his hands in his lap while his eyes remained fixed on the pond.

"Because…" she glanced at him initially frightened thinking he was angry. "I'm not about to leave my best friend like this."

"Like what?"

"Lost."

"I've been lost for as long as I can remember," Noah sighed hopelessly, "So I don't think you can help me there. But I appreciate the offer though." He glanced at her for a second before turning away.

"OK. How about the broken heart then? How about that despite all this crap you've been through, you feel something for Luke," she argued pushing down his slightly raised hand. "Don't you dare try to deny it Noah! I saw you together. I saw the look on your face when he walked away, like he was walking away with your heart"

"It's not that simple Maddie" This time, he actually locked eyes with her as he spoke.

"Is anything ever simple when it comes to love?"

"I guess not," he admitted.

"Then let me help you Noah," Maddie pleaded, grabbing his hand. "Let me help you get your happy ending. You deserve to be happy, after everything your father put you through."

"I left her with him," he said through clenched teeth. Noah struggled to keep his own anger and shame in check. "How do I deserve anything after that? I abandoned my own mother."

Maddie shook her head. "It wasn't your fault, Noah. None of it."

"Yes it is!"

"So that's what keeping you from Luke?" She tilted her head. "Your past?"

"It's complicated."

"Tell me something I don't know."

"You don't understand Maddie. I can't. Believe me I want to. But I just can't"

"Why not, and don't tell me again," she curled her index fingers, "it's complicated."

"What if…" Noah hesitated as he pulled at the grass around him. "What if I told you that this whole thing, working on this farm was a way for me to get something I really wanted? What if being with Luke meant that I was doing something I shouldn't? What if I told you that I was doing something bad, in order to protect someone. That all of this, even my feelings for Luke, was all a lie? Then what?"

"Well," she began. "I wouldn't believe it for a second because I know you Noah. You're a good person. If you were doing something bad, I'm sure you have your reasons." She fell silent for a moment. "But I also know in the end, you'd find a way to fix everything. . . the right way. You're not your father, Noah, despite what you may think. You'll never be him."

"How can you say that?" Noah wanted to condemn himself. He wanted so badly to tell her all about how he had earned a living over the past few years. What he had done to survive. "I'm not the same person I was when we were kids."

"Yes," Maddie said reaching up to touch his cheek. "Yes, you are. You're still the same Noah I know and love."

"How can you…" Noah started to protest.

"I can and I do." There was a look of determination in her eyes. "Call me selfish. But I really don't want to see Luke with Reg. I don't want to see him walking down the aisle with the likes of him."

Noah looked at her and laughed out loud. "You along with the rest of this town. What's so bad about this guy anyway that makes everyone want to run him out of Oakdale permanently."

"Oh c'mon, Noah. You're not actually going to sit there and tell me you don't have a clue."

" You mean apart from the guy being a jerk?"

"I think asshole would better describe Reg," she muttered. "You on the other hand, would be a better match for Luke."

"Yeah right" Noah rolled his eyes. "Look at you, Ms. Matchmaker."

"I know you're feeling something when you're with him"

Noah nodded. "You're right, I do. But I also know I'm not the right guy for him."

"There isn't a Mr. Right or Mr. Wrong here. It's not about that at all."

"But you just said Reg wasn't right for him," Noah pointed out.

"Reg is a special case," She said dryly. "Please Noah, do something before you might lose him."

"I think I already have." Noah dropped his head. "I couldn't tell Luke about you or my father or any of that. I couldn't. It's like I said, Maddie, I've changed. There's a reason why I am here; and it's not the reason you think. I'm not such a good person anymore, I've done things you would never do."

"You're starting to sound like your father again. You're not him and you'll never be! Just take a chance, Noah, or you might lose the best thing that could ever happened to you."

She gave his arm a quick squeeze before rising up and brushing the dirt from her jeans. "But it's up to you whether you want a relationship with Luke."

"Will I see you again?" Noah was frightened at the possibility of not seeing Maddie again for a long time.

"Don't worry. I'll be around, " she said smiling before walking off leaving Noah alone with his thoughts.


End file.
